whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
The drugs are starting to wear off. Suddenly aware there's a girl with bald patches and 2 guys that don't have a full set of teeth between them.
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
Hey I think I found part of your tooth next to your wine bottle in the floor board of my car.
No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
She didn't talk for 45 minutes. We finally convinced her to open her mouth. There was a flower in there.
just found out that she named her cat after me.
He fucks like those drill things that you see when you think of texas
So apparently nutella and chocolate body paint aren't actually the same thing.
It just smells like spaghetti and despair.
I'm sorry I told you to go fuck yourself after you said good morning to me when I was hungover.
Painting strippers breast and vaginas to look like easter eggs. What r u doing tonight.
I'm so upset I left my sombrero at the expo center
Got her pregnant in a minivan. Circle of life.
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
Randomize
