I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
Dude a guy just showed up with alcohol and a bag of double cheese burgers. I think I found my future husband.
I was fine until "Under Pressure" came on the radio. It's like God wanted me to shit my pants on the drive home.
She started puking and I started running and I swear to god there was a wave of vomit chasing me down the stairs.
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
Did you blow the guy you weren't supposed to hook up with again in the bathroom of pita pit? Cause that happened last night...
After her AA meeting, she was on the phone with her mom, and when she said, "they're making me start over with Step 1," I quietly sang, "cut a hole in the box".
She kept asking for cigarettes, than just put them in her purse as "savings"
I guess I'm just gonna have to learn to live with the fact that I'm the guy who takes his pants off at the party and tries to start an orgy
Look, as flattering as it is, I'm getting a little tired of being everyone's go-to girl for a threesome.
Day two of not drinking, I think my cat is trying to eat me.
Psychosis secondary to sobriety???
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
Just accidentally walked into a parade for Jesus
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
Randomize
