i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
Legitimately semi-blackout across the table from the governor off a chardonnay i can't even pronounce.
its not a holiday until ive ruined the family picture because im drunk
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
You made everyone who was on the patio sit on the floor and join your "ship" because you were the Captain. It was cool though. You let me be your 1st Mate.
Hey, hey, hey, hey. This is a hurriCAN.
everyone thought he was too sick to make it, but he showed up. Ten minutes in and he's doing vodka shots with nyquil chasers
trading diseases for a hangover? that's either a really good decision or a really, really bad one. we'll find out if he wakes up tomorrow
Hello, the Less Drunk that has my sister's phone. I am the Moderately Drunk. I am questioning your Friday activities. Why are you not the More Drunk?
She went to her drug test stoned.
And strangely enough, we all know she'll pass it.
Hooked up with a guy that looked like Dean Thomas. Mediocre at best, but I stopped myself from calling him Dean in bed. So I got that going for me.
You realize that if you get murdered while we're talking, I'm gonna have to explain to your next of kin why the last thing on your phone is a picture of my boobs.
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
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