In similar news, my cock is bigger than the plane that landed in the hudson.
Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
I think he'd cut a tree down for me. He's from North Dakota. That's something hot guys do there, right?
Watching Fresh Prince at 9am with a beer in hand and he just said to Uncle Phil "Sometimes I worry that I'll never get my life together." I feel like that was a sign from above or something
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
Hurry there's four guys dressed up as a bachelorette party, one has a condom veil and the rest are selling candy bouquets and asking if anyone wants to get laid for $5
Gotta get new sheets. ..I fucked the satin off mine.
Apparently he got pepper spray on his dick. So he's a literal fire crotch.
HOLY FUCK i just remembered we had bows and arrows and firecrackers last night
and flaming arrows and vodka
how did we not set your garage on fire
I'm glad I date someone who likes the simple things. Sex, kittens, and McDonald's.
I am talking to a naked lesbian about robots. I think this means I win life.
the yoga instructor with the "dirt" and "roots" tattoos is seriously mother nature. i get my period after ever session i have with her. i'm trippin' balls over it.
I'll be naked. By 11. Then arrested. Drunk tank adventures
Randomize
