the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
I hate thxgiving break now because that totally means I'm not able to have sex for a week.
Woke up on the floor holding a sandwich. Shots. Never again.
My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
hurry up this bar wont let me order big pitchers of beer for just myself
Dude walks in wearing jean shorts and a graphic tshirt and goes home with an attractive female. EXPLAIN YOURSELF UNIVERSE.
You realize we were screaming in the car about our apartment next year because we can "bring home randoms whenever we want" and "stare at each other from our door ways"
I feel like there's no sexy way to pull 12 condoms out of your bra.
You puked on the bar then proceeded to walk out. I told the bartender some girl walked up, puked and left and he gave me a free drink. Hope you got home safe.
Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch.
Are you playing pokemon in the dark and sexting? I can't be mad at that.
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
By the way I can not feel my vagina. It's like it's asleep. What the hell did you do?
You thought her boot was a stray dog in your house..
Randomize
