Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
Ask me how many people I've slept with. Because its changed since I last saw you.
I saw you 20 MINUTES AGO. You need to stop this.
You don't understand, alcohol has become a thing of survival for me and without it I can't function as a normal human being
My professor just suggested making the state of the union more interesting by turning it into a drinking game. Brilliant!!
please remember that your boobs are bigger than your sisters. when you borrow her shirts they stretch and then shes left flapping in the breeze. dont borrow her clothes anymore. love dad.
So if we break up over this are you still gonna come over and do my dishes?
Also, we just got yelled at by a cop for being awesome...or making out in a fountain. Whatever.
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
I woke up on the ground next to a bed of naked men. I'm either a drunken genius or the enemy....
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
I am the prescription. I can be taken orally or vaginally and in any dosage. This is why I went to med school.
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
Sending dick pics while driving a car going 80 in the rain at night to a married woman? Why hello 2014
I come into the house and he's fucking doing karaoke by himself... Lady gaga
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
Randomize
