He was all up on my grill like I was having a BBQ. I DONT EVEN KNOW HOW TO USE A GRILL.
keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
I don't know how God could bestow someone that emotionally confused with such an awesome penis.
Found a left over fake Olympic medal from our party last weekend. Awarded it to a random girl in the bar last night. Its the only thing she was wearing this morning when she woke up at my place.
And then i had a penis in each hand. It was magical.
This morning is cloudy with a high chance of vomiting all over the dentist. Stay tuned for further updates.
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
Can you rollerblade?
No, why?
Honestly, I was high and picturing us roller blading together. I wanted to see if I could make my dreams a reality.
After getting all 4 of my wisdom teeth removed I asked my dentist how much better would I be at head
After fooling around at the hotel til dawn, I managed to feed her with my free buffet passes. Tastes like sweet victory.
Well, I woke up on a roll-away, with a knot in the back of my head and penis confetti stuck to me. Also, I apparently literally gave the shirt off my back right before I passed out, so I was topless. Vegas won this trip.
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
I would ride that face into the sunset
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
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