just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
Can't imagine what could be worse than pet-naming your penis, but I'll let it go.
I'm home alone watching The Hills seasons, eating pickles and drinking straight rye. I just googled "how to make friends". Probably not the most pro-active solution. Help.
Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that
I just hit a new low..poured my beer in an empty coke can so I could drink in walmart.
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
you spent 5 minutes trying to open an empty PBR and kept saying "don't worry i'll get it i've been working out"
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
Tell me you remember me getting a tampon from the girl throwing up in the next stall
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
Actually I more feel like I'm on a ship about to grab the holy grail off an island
The ship is me being high the holy grail is some profound idea I'm about to have
I'm going to fake an anxiety attack to get to the front of the line. Save me some brisket.
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
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