I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
After watching Cinemax for a few months, real porn just grosses me out.
when my professor asked "does anyone know what streches across south america" and a kid in the back row said "my exgirfriends vagina" i knew i was at home.
Just saw a porn entitled "Nad Biter". Redheads are now forever out of the picture.
you want your laptop back?
are you giving me my laptop back, or cashing in on our break up sex?
both.
come over.
Bjs on a first date are the gateway to getting to know someone for who they really are.
How is it that you get into at least one taco related fight a year?
By "met a doctor" I really mean "fucked a pre med student"
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
Oh okay. That's fine. I'll buy us both dinner when you bail me out
It's a post jail date
It was like being run over by an orgasm freight train.
I'm like bob the builder except I'm fixing boners.
Somehow my family started talking about sex toys at breakfast.
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