if she mentions anything about chili and my phone, just go with it
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
Most fantastic sex ever until her Doberman took an interest in what we were doing. There was nothing more terrifying then feeling warm dog breath on my ballsack.
you can feel better about your life now. i slept with a guy who has gold teeth
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
Do you remember using the vicegrip to demonstrate how wide your penis is?
U know when u get really drunk and u don't think anyone can see what your doing? If I'm that drunk the possibilities are endless
New game I thought of while bored on the train. Anytime I get a text from an ex, I will randomly text a different ex. It's like a less charitable version of pay it forward.
He literally said I should watch game of thrones while I was blowing him like is this the conversation you want to be having right now
Well I met my booty call's parents by accident, so that happened.
I can't believe i lost my ID... bringing my birth certificate to the club was a weird experience
He's been pretending to be gay for 3 months in order to get free weed.
How does one take the "you're the best sex I've ever had but I'm marrying someone that's sub-par in the sack" mind fuck?
I pity the fool.
Thanks Mr T.
The night got way more interesting after Jimmy started doing summersaults in front of the bar.
Randomize
