So while she was giving me a lap dance I told her I quit med school. Just so she didn't feel like the only one who's made bad decisions in their life.
you did pass out in the elevator last night, so it could be motion sickness
I was in a threesome last night that turned into a violent domestic dispute with damage to a hotel. Wish you were there!
The Fresno prostitute seemed offended all I wanted from her was directions back to the freeway.
by the end of the night two people were passed out at the table, three on the couches, and one in the bathroom. it looked like someone pumped sleeping gas into the middle of a dinner party.
I don't understand how 5 bottles of booze became normal or acceptable per 2.5 people
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
You puked on the bar then proceeded to walk out. I told the bartender some girl walked up, puked and left and he gave me a free drink. Hope you got home safe.
There are no female cereal mascots. I just realized that in my drunken state... So sexist...
You have no idea I looked like the porno version of Laura Ingalls Wilder
I seriously doubt I'm gonna be able to properly put your dick in my mouth whilst upside down, but I'm willing to give it my best shot
I quit life. I got pulled over on my way to work and they towed my car and dropped me off at work in a cop car
I never want to even look at fireball again because it reminds me of the night I died and then lived to tell the tale of how I died.
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
Happy 20th birthday! I hope you like anxiety and having your debit card declined at McDonald's!
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