To bright to open both eye. Get pizza and put in feeding tube so i can sleep more
And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
so, my congressman just called me to say he has office hours this week if i'm still interested in talking to him. i pray to god this is not related to Friday.
Theres someone in the car behind me eating corn on the cob & talking on the phone
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
I don't know who he was, where he came from, or where he went, but he just handed me a bowl of mac and cheese and left. It was good too.
Someone apparently named 'eleaw' just text me asking if I had fun last night.
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
I remember because you made a pirate noise when you came.
I hope you have a dream of a sloth with my face touching you erotically
i'm face down in a ditch right now please help this is not a metaphor for my life this is real.
just because you have a nice tits it doesn't make you a magic little snowflake.
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
Randomize
