Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
I don't know what's more sad: The fact that he fingered the side of my leg, or the fact that the side of my leg feels like a vagina.
question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
Nothing ruins a good sext like too many emoticons
I seem to remember you being very disappointed that drinking Michelob Ultra didn't give you magic powers.
Put cigar in mouth backwards. Plz remind to check for scar in morning, can't feel it now. Screwdrivers are like morphine.
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
ders ninda duuude pooring goden shots ov glory. I see em an i dont but there hear.
are you attempting voice recognition while drunk again?
Why am I getting texts saying are you ready for this butthole? Help
Two dicks, one me.
Yoga's definitely paying off.
Hey my dad gave me life the least I can do is take him chicken strips and a pack of marlboros.
He pulled out a red and green condom and then started humming "Here Comes Santa Claus." Happy holidays indeed.
I showed up to a job interview wearing two different shoes. If that's not an omen, I don't know what is.
Randomize
