garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
So I think I just got a job offer from the guy I used to blow. See, networking pays off.
When you get home we need to compare our schedules and set up masturbation slots. I'm scares of you walking in on me. Again.
i distinctly remember leaping through the apartment to rescue the clam chowder burning in the kitchen
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
Thanksgiving Shitshow: My grandparents found me passed out on the bathroom floor wearing nothing but a scarf made of toilet paper
I gotta shower this stuff off me I'm starting to hear baby kittens in the toilet tank again..
I just spent 10 min explaining to my mom how orange is a strange color. I think she knows
And then we will celebrate by drinking and making fun of him. As per usual.
Still slightly drunk, sitting in Hyde park village. Two small children are dancing and singing "call me maybe" on the fountain in front of me. Am I hallucinating?
Just looked at the TV in the bar for the weather report. Didn't want to walk home drunk during a tornado warning
It was a successful conference for my sales and my sex life. Those are probably related
I guarantee you he will only fuck with old bitches from now on
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