I love Japanese schoolgirls with short skirts riding bikes on windy days.
You're never coming back, are you?
I can't get away from Pickles they're either stuck in me, in my mouth, or I'm stuck in one. fuck my whole entire life.
Hey its the Filipino guy from last night. I just wanted to say sorry my friend bled all over your driveway. Great party though.
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
Funny how often beer equates to second degree burns on some portion of my body.
I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
Blacked out at the beach and unblacked out at a piano bar singing Tiny Dancer.
its warm now so i can go back to sleeping with guys based on their fuckability rather than how much warmth they generate.
Puke, feathers, beads, and solo cups all on my way to class. I'm surprised anyone's alive after this weekend.
Well for decently drunk, in the woods, last-person-i-should-be-hooking-up-with sex, i thought it was pretty good.
I may quit my job to go be a costumed Jedi at Disneyland.
I don't think my professor is going to remember the Halloween party... or the fact that he made out with a priest.
I just poured two shots of fireball into my Rapunzel mug I love finals.
We made out in front of everyone INCLUDING his girlfriend. And no one saw. THAT DRUNK!
That bitch claimed that you said it was ok if she drank your vodka. Obviously she has never met you
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