We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
I had total buyers remorse when i finally got him naked. All that effort for a dude that hairy? Come on.
went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
Now I'm watching The History of Sex on the History Channel. They're talking about how repressed the 30s were. I think I understand why grandma is such an angry person.
I am trying to figure out how to tell this kid i have a boyfriend in a way that still allows me to smoke free weed
Guy in the room next to us in the ER is chanting "I'm jeff and I'm drunk". He's trying to get released to finish tailgating for the Iowa game that starts in 9 hours.
In 30 minutes I will have been sober for an entire month. Time for a celebratory lap of cheap alcohol that leads to early liver failure.
But happy liver failure. That's what counts.
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
"willing to pay anyone fun whos willing to hang out and laugh at my jokes while my friends are MIA" is this to desperate?
I want to just live in between your butt cheeks.
I just wanna be euthanized
Thas it
I'm keeping both. The way I see it, boyfriends come and go, but a good dick is forever.
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
Just cuz you've got the biggest dick I've ever seen doesn't mean u can wake me up at 2 am
Randomize
