you started crying because you didn't get to wear your rainboots this week so i turned on the shower and let you jump around in it
youre the best friend ever
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
Do you think we're allowed to sign male strippers into the building with a valid id?
I don't want the last thing I hear while alive to be Jesse's Girl
Fixing to yell "you're too hot for her" at a Gerard butler look alike. There is absolutely no way this is going to end well...
Im pretty sure my housekeeper high fived her on the way out this morning
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
i’m just listening to christina aguilera’s “your body” on repeat and trying not to pass out at my desk.
YOU DESERVE A GUY WITH A NORMAL DICK DONT SETTLE FOR ANYTHING LESS
god dammit I AM NO LONGER PUTTING UP WITH YOUR HETEROSEXUALITY I QUIT
oh my god you are days, if not hours away from a dick pic. This is the day the lord has made rejoice and be glad in it
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
Just shared a bacon biscuit with my cat.... Life is weird for me right now
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
I just had a man tell me he was going to think about me when he was fucking his wife tonight. This is my proudest moment as a gay.
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