and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
We walked into the bar in The Flying V formation from The Mighty Ducks. We were ready.
Listening to her yell about my drinking problem is not helping my hangover.
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
I just got released from jail. still in my kilt. bring pants damnit. they won't understand.
pants will make it better? really?
I'm pretty sure every guy I've been with this weekend has made a solid attempt at getting me pregnant...
Talked to Nate, told him he was a douche. Will give details when sober. It's ok. You're my best friend together a wolf pack. Olive juice.
She ran over a curb, took out a yard-sale sign and hit a fence before admitting to me that she may be losing her vision "a bit". Never letting grandma drive again.
last thing I remember is yelling 'sit on my face' through a traffic cone
You have not lived until you and a ginger miget chick are jumping and waving your arms in a pitch black bathroom to turn on the motion lights. Yes, today I have officially lived.
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
I may have passed out and puked all over the host's favorite couch, but three hours and a rip later, I was eating tiramisu in the bathtub with the birthday boy and a hot Italian.
Trying to decide if I'm relieved or disappointed that I didn't receive any fuck boi calls on nye
Randomize
