kyle and i were puking, simultaneously, off the front porch at 4 am, and in the middle of it he looks up, reaches his hand over, and says "knucks." And then I proceeded to fist bump him. By farrr the best time I've ever had puking.
She might as well just lie down with one of those red "Easy Buttons" next to her
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
We were suposed to have a 3some in their bathroom but it just turned into us 2 making out while he watched like a little kid on christmas morning
You got me so high that I almost couldn't leave my house for a bar because there was nothing to lean against on the way there
You called me to pick you up from the bar at 9:00. When we drove over the speed bumps you put your hands in the air and pretended you were on a roller coaster.
The last thing I remember was wearing a sombrero and trying to do cartwheels in the club
You did one successfully. Then smashed into the wall
My mom comes home from her weekend with her lesbian co-workers and asks "You wanna know how I got these bruises?" I've never been more torn about anything EVER.
Needless to say, she forgave him, they're back together, and I'm seriously considering having a lesbian year.
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
He came so hard that he yelled what sounded like a spell from Harry Potter.
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
Dude, you got arrested for trying to direct traffic with your dick....
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
Randomize
