I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
It got a little outta hand when you wanted to do body shots on the table.. at Dennys.. at 4 AM.. with lemonade
we went to the bar with our boss and you tried to play a song from the atm machine
I just saw a guy in a sombrero and holding an inflated blow-up doll in all her "glory" get escorted out of the mall. I hate Marley.
I woke up with a russian doll attached to my necklace and a post-it note with "keep babushka safe" written on it. Fuck vodka
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
Some chick asked if she could eat me because I'm dressed as a taco. I introduced her to RJ. Best Wingman.
I'm almost positive that you shat in a birdhouse
our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni
Your ability to whip out your dick and take a pic anytime I text you is startling.
How the fuck do you get a noise complaint filed against you at 9:30am on a fucking Tuesday?
I have two bottles of emergency tequila stashed under my desk at work.
It's difficult to focus on bonds when you know your classmate peed in your mouth
Just saw a car towing a guy on skis drive by so that’s how Syracuse is doing today.
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