I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
9 of the 12 girls i had sex with in college are on facebook
it was an ugly road back then. i'm sure time hasn't been friendly.
we need to stop having unprotected sex.
ya i know. we're like the secret life of the american whores.
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
Walk-of-shaming home from Brooklyn in a Jesus costume that has "what wouldn't Jesus do" written on the robe.
Please stop using the dehumidifier for your weed.
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
the thought 'we cant do it, we're in a public place' crossed my mind, and then I realized he's succeeding if he's trying to domesticate me.
elevator sex. pronto.
So drunk. Washed my hair un pancheros sink cus I was so hot.
What do you need? A swimsuit and a liver of steel? What else?
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
Today I learned I and my bar naps were the subject of a bar meeting.
I got the beer and the first aid kit. You get the tequila and burn cream. We should be set for the camping trip.
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?
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