Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
her vagina probably looks like a grenade went off in a deli
I noticed how good my hair still looked. Apparently rum and coke in it helps it stay curly thru sex. May be using this more often.
she made me take her to the grocery store to buy a gallon of sweet tea and a shit ton of band aids, the cashier asked if someone was hurt and she replied "not yet.."
Ever have those mornings where you just can't wait to puke in the shower?
you force-fed me gummy vitamins while screaming "I JUST WANT YOU TO BE HEALTHY" i have never been so terrified in my life.
Thanks for alerting everyone in our apartment what your one night stand's name is. Could you scream a little louder?
I wrote my name on his balls in sharpie. In the homosexual world that's like a diamond ring. Shits permanent.
If you listen closely you can hear the sound of inbreeding and shame.
We got back from Mcdonalds and literally 5 minutes of being in your room, you wanted to go back because "We haven't been yet."
We swapped clothes. He left in a v-neck and I left in a tuxedo. Classiest walk of shame or the gayest?
Someone had Captain Morgan and orange juice at the same moment I lost my hangover and I just had to give it a try.
I can't feel my clothes. I'm convinced I'm naked
Get drunk. Masturbate to his picture. Fall asleep. Repeat. Fuck summer.
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
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