Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
There's a pair of socks on the bar. No-one's questioned this.
She was sitting there stuffing her face rubbing my back with a dorito cheese filled hand while eating something else with the other hand as I was crying.
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
I started to trust fall random people on the dance floor
Went to anytime fitness at 3:34 am drunk after the the bar and getting whataburger. Lifted weights with my cheeseburger between my knees. That's called DEDICATION.
I think that last shot was nyquil. Please come gte me. WINGS.
No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.
I just hooked up with the same bartender my dad cheated on my mom with in the 90s. Not sure how this makes me feel.
family traditions my good sir
He told me he was married and then fingered me on the kitchen counter. It was awkward to explaining the broken toaster to my roommates this morning...
He called me saying he got nice rims for his car so now we can fuck in style
First night of sleeping in the same bed, and she farted on me. I immediately excused myself and went home. Don't know if we're still together. Will update you.
after sex he fell asleep with his water bottle in one hand and his dick in the other at 6pm. I'm a winner.
He came into my room last night and started peeing underneath my desk, I told him the bathroom was the next door over.
Oh btw, ur tongue should count as a second cock it's that good
Randomize
