You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
last night i found out that my 11 year old cousin used me as an example of what not to do in her D.A.R.E. speech. awesome.
Kinda wish I banged him. I need the exercise.
Having a pigeon watch you poop is just creepy. Drunk or not.
OK, the bar's closing. Do I go to home to my wife or my girlfriend?
then he compared my vagina to a dishwasher. A DISHWASHER?!
Also, fighting a very strong urge to nickname your dick Whitey Bulger, at least for today.
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
I definitely made out with a high school student last night while his sister and my brother were in the same room. I think we're all traumatized by the situation.
HOW LONG TILL THESE DRUGS WEAR OFF. I WORK IN ONE HOUR, I REPEAT, I WORK IN ONE HOUR.
your vagina must have magic restorative powers I feel rested and powerful this morning.
I AM A GOOD PERSON AND THEREFORE I DESERVE QUALITY DICK!
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
He was tied up with the electrical tape and force fed wine from a box. It was never going to end well.
How naked do you want me to be?
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