I'll collect that couch/porn sloopy beedge tomorrow just FYI
I wonder what it would be like to be a slice of cheese.
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
so i woke up this morning covered in mail. none of it is mine.
So you walked 4 miles to get home but stopped by the store first to get a vegetable tray? How drunk were you?
I know its only noon but, Im too drunk to hold this baby...
this is your 3rd pregnancy scare in 2 years, I think its time for you to re-evaluate the whole 'im a lesbian' thing
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
A DRUNK EMT IS BETTER THAN NO EMT!!!
she fascinated with the iron the back of the toilet seat. she made me sit in the bathroom with her for a solid 10 minutes while she just stared and laughed at it
I just commented on the education level of his penis.
Remember that time we got drunk tomorrow
I don't deserve a penis
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
I think I pulled a boob muscle during phone sex
Randomize