he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
There's a woman here that looks like a cross between Michael Jackson and Flipper.
note to self..putting cheap vodka in a bottle of grey goose does not make it taste better
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
everything was going well until edgar threatened to handcuff the security guard to himself.
Now you have tequila AND fuzzy slippers. Fuck you. I want that to be MY night.
No exaggeration. At the gas station she handed me the mop from over the counter and told me that's my last drink of the night
Can I just put my face in your boobs and forget the world?
I just hit on a guy in a doughnut store... is that too suggestive?
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
I peed my pants walking home last night... I just kept walking.
Guess who's the proud owner of her very own foxtail butt plug!!
I teamed up with my vagina. I compromised his morals and then she corrupted him for good. It’s been a very successful and slutty partnership
it is time to test the effects of half a loaf of bread and overconfidence on the human body
Randomize
