Yay Minnesota! I can't believe there's now a US Senator who has taken more acid than we have
Roller skating + drunkeness + peeing = mess
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
you set the microwave for an hour telling me that the done sound was your alarm.
Somebody left a mini pitcher in the bathroom. Think its safe?
Last time I stayed at my moms my fucking car got set on fire sooo maybe I should think this through.
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
he stopped during sex, told me i smelled like McDonald's and went harder..
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
I just power smoked 3 bongs, ate hot cocoa mix before making hot cocoa, and realized James Spader's character on The Office reminds me of your mom.
I'm trying to find some better sex background music so his neighbors don't hate us. This is tedious.
How are you and your magical vagina doing today?
ill drive you to the airport today if we can have sex first
i left yesterday
ill pick you up from the airport on sunday if we can have sex after
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
I refuse to take any type of advice let alone love advice from a motherfucker who is missing 3 fingers from a Fucked up masturbating accident.
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