I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
You were playing beer pong by yourself. Finally someone took the ball and threw it into the bonfire. You sat by it, cried, and contemplated how to get it out. For 45 minutes.
I literally sat down and peed with my underwear still on. How does that happen?
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
so im gonna ask for shark week off tomorrow at work and i advise you do the same
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
Thanks again for allowing my sister to lose her virginity on your bed.
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
You crawled through a doggy door 5 times for a shot if cheap vodka.
There are 18k people at the game and I'm next to the one guy who pulls his underwear down to his ankles to piss.
Dad just showed up on someone else's golf cart, filled an ice chest with booze and left while yelling "SHINANIGANS!!!!" this is going no where fast.
It'll just be like "PENIS HERE". In case you get lost.
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
My mom always wanted to raise a classy lady, it just turned out to not be her daughter.
I DIDN'T WATCH THE PILLSBURY DOUGH BOY PORN!!!!
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