margarita scented body wash shouldn't be used the morning after cuervo. there should be a warning on the label.
It's almost summer. We need to start reconnecting with our home drug dealers.
oh, you know. just sitting in my bed high as fuck wearing a windbreaker and watching british tv.
thanks for the bloody nose. you probably dont remember, i'm not mad.. only because your boobs are to blame
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
Every time I stand up, gravity punches me in the tits. This is horrible.
I just very easily got pretty high off of one bowl of shitty dirt weed. I'm a sad excuse for who I used to be.
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
Do not tell me that that is not the face of a man who has sex with goats.
I still owe him the card with all the sperm paper cutouts falling out like glitter saying " sorry you can't hold your load. Better luck next time "
i just found a red feather stuck to my penis and i really wanted to send you a picture but too much
I fucked my ex boyfriend to get shrooms for you guys
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
He does impressions. Handy knowing you can get fucked by one guy and pretend a group of celebrities is running a train on you.
yeah, i'm probably gonna die. still gonna be totally worth it tho
but next to his bed he has a bible, and on the bible he has a pbr coaster and a condom. how can i stay mad at that? Its amazing.
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