Things overheard in WeHo: "Just drink a corona and eat some ass, you won't be hungry anymore"
OK...I gotta go get strawberry short cake cakes and knee pads
A 14 year old with a teardrop tattoo just tried to sell me weed. I'm in the wrong fucking neighborhood.
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
someone wrote on his wall: "congrats on your engagement"
I think you may want to look into that...
I think I'm the only sober person in the whole bar. If you count drinking less than 10 tequilas sober.
Does me being hung over take away from how professional I can be today?
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
I think i'm the first person to get kicked out of a club while completely sober. Come outside please!!
We kind of crashed their funeral party. Oops.
Friday is the holy day of drinking. Thou shalt observe the Sabbath. It's in the bible. Look it up bitch.
Just found out that my name comes from part of my mom's old stripper name.
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
Man, I miss taking bong rips in my room. Now they are bringing dogs around so all my stuff is hidden in random places up in the woods. I literaly have to hunt and gather just to get high.
Randomize
