it's fine if we fail the bar, we were never going to satisfy the moral character requirement anyway
I drunkenly asked a stripper to join our volleyball team.
woke up wearing a canadian flag with the starting forward of the hockey team. i feel oddly patriotic
Last time I sleep with a guy with a penchant to fragrance his dick. Every time I sit to pee, I get a whiff of Axe body spray.
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
So I had sex in a bulldozer lastnight now that's definitely a first...
I just got a get of my turf look from a hooker. Apparently, Ninja Turtles T-shirt+Jeans+Flip-Flops=Hooker Gear. Woot.
Note to self; if you can light it on fire, you probs shouldn't drink it
well I got an eye infection from a stripper motorboating me but overall it was a great weekend
But you put your finger in my ass and the rest is history
So stoned that I pressed the unlock button on my car keys to walk into my bedroom...
Well, i'm not hugging a bag of cheetos and crying while I watch Friends wishing that we were Ross and Rachel. So clearly I'might doing better than last night.
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
I realized it was late, and he was my brother in humanity and another incarnation of my own life force and consciousness, so I regained control of myself, thanked him for helping me, and went home.
Bank just called....we left my debit card in the ATM last night.
Randomize
