Do you think an esthetician would be willing to wax the Chanel Cs into my crotch? That way, whenever a guy gets ready to pound on it I can go "Careful, it's Chanel."
We better get laid next semester cause I prayed hard
I even walked 30 feet with my eyes closed from two love rocks so that we get some cock
your ability to fuck hot guys even when you go out in sweats amazes me
remember that response paper i wrote naked, at 745am still drunk with a naked dude in my bed? yeah, totally got an a- on that. and he loved my insight.
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
It was a deal breaker when she told me not to wear a condom and god would decide if we were meant to be together.
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
I agreed not to hook up with any randoms while she's on vacation, if that isn't a show of good faith then I don't know what is...
Sloppy and selfish. Your 27 and you don't know where my clit is? BYEEE
She pulled me up to my feet by my hair. I thought it was you for a second. My drunken angel savior.
Just fell off my bed trying to pose and take a nude for you. Probably broke my wrist
Oh, now I remember why I deleted your number. You're kind of a dick. Please delete mine.
I made him leave to get me chicken nuggets so I could have sex with his roommate
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
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