last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
I just overhead some girl saying that she's trying out for the real world so she has a backup if she doesn't get into teach for america...
Eventually evolution will just give us a better liver anyway, so our great great grandkids should THANK us for our binge drinking.
I just watched a girl in the library pull a vodka bottle out of her bag. I think I'm going to give her my number.
just found a bag of Oreos in my purse labeled "emergency".
Just met me in 10 years...this lady keeps an emergency wine cooler in her bag
it's ok. he made up for it by standing there and holding my purse while i made out with three guys at the bar. it was a pretty good night.
Everything tastes like Lysol. Am I dying?
I legit just said "vaginal access denied" then told him his password hint was "tequila shots"
I don't know if I have the sustained energy level for partying hard
Not a choice. You are mistaking my comments as options. My statements are facts. This is what is happening.
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
That's just how I roll. I drink, then tell people I'm either not wearing underwear or I'm training to be a stripper.
sometimes u just gotta ride a dildo and forget about life
Randomize
