what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
He has 250 profile pictures. Of course he was a douchebag
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
I AM SUCH A BETTER PERSON ON DRUGS
What's a quick way to get over an ex-boyfriend? To hear about how he threw up in a cup and then drank it. That's how.
I would say I'm the man in the relationship but I'm cuddled on the couch eating cake mix and water.
I woke up and he was just feeling up my stomach. I felt like buddha and he was rubbing my belly for good luck. never again.
And by "schedule" I meant crumbled up liquor store receipt, that I wrote shit on.
I'll pick you up. Avoid slightly awkward no-we're-not-dating-but-I'm-still-screwing-your-son-after-2-years parental run-ins.
Champagne pong turned into an expensive and painful experience.
I just made a drink so ill shit. It's goona be great. Ill tell you about it when you get here. Get pumped. For my shit.
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
I'm going to sleep with this bank teller and I'm going to enjoy it, just try and stop me
I can never have sex in Utah again. The altitude had me breathing like a fat kid going up stairs.
It involves me, my best friend, and a stripper and her mother.
Randomize
