His text read: Sex? I replied: Not drunk enough. He bought 4 more rounds and tantalized me with the offer pizza later. This could be the beginning of a beautiful relationship.
My low point of the night was when my roommate spit out her jello shot and i took it...
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
every single kid we've ever known, every single person we've gotten blow jobs from, every single person we've hit home runs with... is at dennys right now
The dentist just giggled when he accidentally shot water across my face, I can sense how he treats women.
Two bottles of champagne and half a pizza later, I'm crying myself to tears watching The Nanny. Happy finals week.
I left myself a trail of jello shots, that ended at his door. OR maybe he left me a trail of jello shots at his door. DO I GO IN!?
You did a line of free coke with an obese Slovenian unlicensed cab driver in the toilets of the most questionable strip club in the country. New low man.
When you put it like that, I'm inclined to agree.
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
I had 2 bags of iv saline fuilds for brunch and the buffet at the strip club for dinner. happy easter.
I mean, that's eating your cake and fucking it too.
I spent all the money my grandpa gave me for Christmas last night….solid start to 2015
can we not speak foreign languages when I'm on drugs
Randomize
