Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
I asked her if she watches the office. She said no, but do you watch I'm a celebrity get me outa here? That's when i knew. Deal breaker
found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.
Just promise me you won't ring in the new decade by clutching onto a toilet
The tent neighbors already set us on fire w an errant roach. How do you think Bonnaroo's going?!
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
is there a way to sugar-coat "shes in jail" when someone is texting me asking where their friend is?
Let the vodka take you where it will. Like Pocahontas, but wasted
I told you all we needed steroids to survive the tour de franzia, like the bikers. But nobody listened...
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
Sorry, I was watching the Olympic story about the Canadian guy and drinking out of the prescription bottle and crying because it was so beautiful.
I need two food groups: booze and turkey sandwiches
Give me one good reason why I should go with you.
Free beer.
..pick me up at 8.
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
Randomize
