i just shoved 27 marshmallows in my mouth
well thats a nice change of pace from what you normally put in your mouth
so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
The dorm having an ice machine is their way of inviting us to make mixed drinks.
I'll be visiting the rave tower. Prepare your finest boxed wines for my consumption.
Was I at least a good cuddler? Like at least honorable mention?
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
You fell asleep on the toilet and he was like uh should I take her off?
We were sexting and i didn't know what to say, so i said i wanted to wrap him in tortillas and devour him like a burrito. then i went on by saying that i liked my burritos with a lot of cheese.
Not to play devil's advocate, but, considering how our species has evolved so far... I'm kinda rooting for the sun on the whole heat death thing.
Nice. Make him jerk off and tape it. Send it to his woman. I also love that you had another skype date
I want to meet people. Preferably ones with penises
Randomize