So remember when i bet you that girl uses dick to validate her existence?
...yea
She's valid.
I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
we saw a llama on the side of the road. That's when we knew everything was going to be alright.
You know, he picked a really shitty time to stop sleeping with me to pay attention to his girlfriend.
The poor thing was so drunk they wheeled his motorcycle into the bar. I just dropped him off to pick it up. The best walk of shame ever.
Gotta admit I did think about bartering you out to the gay guys for $20 and the dudes flashy neck scarf
We got to the second bar and all he kept saying was "I'm on an alcohol safari!" Best 21st birthday ever.
He's rescued me passed out naked on the playground next door and I've rescued him passed out naked in the middle of campus. That's why we're a great couple.
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
Where was Alyssa when you were sniffing the bouncer?
Passed out on some guy who looked like someone from Duck Dynasty.
Seriously I am not buying you condoms anymore. You're 22, if you aren't woman enough to buy them yourself then you don't deserve orgasms. Grow some tits.
I'm pretty sure NORMAL roommates don't have to hide each others sex toys from their fuck buddies.
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
A guy I don't even know just ate me out on a washing machine at a random persons afterparty. I came as it was going through spin cycle.Just kept thinking "who does laundry during a party?"
Randomize
