I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
I just saw a sign that said "STRIPPERS!!! As seen on Jerry Springer!". As if Springer is the highest honor. I'm pretty sure we're in south Georgia.
just got carried INTO the bar by 4 people. it's like watching my weekend in reverse.
Theres a picture of you standing next to a John Wayne cardboard cutout that says dont drink and drive. your buddy is shirtless holding a beer and youre holding your keys up with marker on your face.
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
ill give you food and tequilla and penis and joy
Not blacking out at our finals party is my Everest
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
I've never wanted to punch a 94 year old woman in the vagina, and then call her next of kin to tell them I just muff punched their Gam Gam until today.
Then he shook the next streetlight but this one broke and fell over. He told me, "This is the part where we run."
Well I just saw a fully naked man doing a headstand in a cooler of ice water.
well at least you got laid last nighT. I woke up on a pile of laundry
we bonded over knowing every word to freaky gurl by gucci mane so it’s kinda starting to make sense why I gave him head in his cul de sac
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