i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
I just met the 30 percent of the population with an STD
She said I wasn't helping her abandonment issues by not responding to her texts at 4 am
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
Look, if he's not the brother with three nipples, I'm just not interested.
She literally just puked and rallied AT HER OWN WEDDING. Welcome to White Trash town, America.
Maybe shotgunning 4 days after oral surgery wasn't such a good idea after all...
She was mid-sentence and then BOOM the hammock broke off the tree. I about pissed myself. Hot Sprite and Vodka make the world go round.
Some guy just rode an office chair down my street, I hope he comes back so I can give him my number.
These are your "grown up" slampiece's new hours of operation; please plan accordingly
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
Hi, I put a dog in your house, I hope it's yours.
My school has hired a professional rum bottle juggler for our dining hall this evening.
This is why we can never be just regular friends. The shit we do is not regular
Who fucking spams baby shark at a sports bar
Randomize
