I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
My mom just informed me that my dog licks their toes while her and my dad are having sex. I'm apartment searching.
captain morgan taught me last night that resee's puffs are way better when eaten straight out of the sink.
He thanked me for being "his little blond pogo stick last night". Good thing?
Do you ever just think "I could really go for a good 30 minute blowjob". I do. Everytime jill smiles.
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects?
Lesson of the night- sweaty dick can get stuck to ice, and require medical attention.
They're putting plan B in vending machines now. My life just got so much easier.
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
No one likes wet exercise unless it's vigorous sex in the shower
I wanna snuggle with you as we feed each other chipotle burrito bowls and that's just where I'm at right now
You know you hit Mardi Grad bottom when you come to in someone's kitchen on the floor and you are eating gumbo out of a Mixing bowl with a ladle......yeah rock fucking bottom
She should be a lawyer. She convinced her husband to give her a hall pass AFTER he walked in on her in bed with her ex-bf
We’ve got a propane heater on our back porch if you want to come over and eat a McRib in peace
Randomize
