Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
please just be careful, i just switched my facebook status to "in a relationship", i would look really pathetic if i had to change it back to "single" already
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
Sometimes I wonder if my parents know that I mean horny when I say lonely.
That's the only definition of lonely that I know.
and ive been naked for the greater part of the evening. alone, drunk, and naked. i think that is how all great interventions start.
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
So after tonight I now have 6 Harry Potter movies left to get laid to. Before tonight it was 8. Fucking right
All I've succeeded in doing since I saw you is drool on my shoulder
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
If you are breathing, I want you at your house. No non-breathing-related excuses.
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
All I remember is allowing my uber driver to pull over on the side of the road to give me a massage. I was alone
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
Randomize
