I am coming home for anal
* a nap*
My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
Tell her you can forgive her unacceptable behavior because her dad and his dog weren't married when they conceived her.
Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.
I don't feel bad about fucking old guys. That's what I want. It's what I likeeeeee.
The only rule I'm making for myself tonight is to not drink out of the sink at the bar.
He said you asked to eat pepperoni off his dick and he thought it was weird
I mean I thought it sounded fun
I accidentally left my shirt at my booty calls house. He washed it & hung it up for me in his closet. I can't decide if that's sweet or creepy
My ex's new gf is pregnant and he is sterile, so 2016 is starting off well.
I can't believe the police had to bring me to my booty call last night
just had a woman ask me to donate my eggs so that her baby could look like me. don't know whether to get a restraining order or be flattered. thoughts?
I LinkedIn messaged people about jobs when I was blacked out
His dick smelled like strawberries...it was awesome.
She dry humped my leg in the raw while I was still dressed, came, and then fell asleep on top of me. All I got was a bruised thigh. 2020 needs to end.
Randomize
