I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
his apartment was in a funeral home, walk of shamed through a visiation in the skankiest outfit i own
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
Bad news? she threw her drink in his face, left her phone at the club, and disappeared. I found her laying in bed with the bottle she stole from our VIP service. Good news is she's asleep and I have the bottle, come home
I took in his dog. My exboyfriend still calls me for 2 things, blow jobs and animal rescue. I need to end this cycle
There's holes in the drywall and the beer pong table is a broken door on two barstools. You know they like to party.
You. Dating a sex offender cop. Life writes itself sometimes.
Just woke up. Naked. Under an animal pelt. With a girl. I've never met her. She's pretty naked too.
The worst part about living in a small town is partying with your pharmacist and then having to buy Plan B from him the next morning.
You were a cyclone of alcohol and bad decisions - like a gay Tazmanian devil
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
Like pizza and mermaids make up about 1/3 of my thoughts on the weekends.
8 minutes into the New Year and and I've already sent a nude...new year, new me?
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