Just saw a girl that looks like Michelle Obama and Im strangely aroused by her. Does that make me a democrat?
Just lost my virginity while listening to rick astley. torn between horror and jubilation
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
Literally 6000 elephants in my backyard.
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
Going abroad, it was like my vagina was in a candy store... a sweet sweet british candy store
yeah i fucked her in the storage room on the inflatable mattress. i don't know if i should feel proud for me or bad for her.
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
Just took last nights make up off with a sock. That hungover.
I feel like I'm in an ocean of eels jacking me off
When the nurse referred to my vag as "your downstairs", I knew I found the perfect Doctors office.
He finally delivered on the dick pic, and Jesus Christ, it was worth the wait.
YOU TOOK A FUCKING SNAP OF ME TRYING TO PEE! I'M GOING TO FUCK YOU WITH THE BUSINESS END OF A RUTED RAKE!
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
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