I would have done the walk of shame but I couldnt walk
This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
Mmmm, vodka for breakfast
ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
My parents just told me I first got drunk when I was 4. Successsssssss
just got invited to smoke a bowl by a guy who has a prostetic leg and has been on the jerry springer show multiple times. I love my life right now
got so drunk i was kicked out of my own birthday party and tried taking a bottle of vodka with me
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
I caught him with his head in the spinach bag this morning. He was laughing demonically saying, "i love spinach, yes I do."
we are out of drugs. and patience. please bring former.
Off topic, but is it sad that Matthew and I are calculating how much sex we need to have in order to work off a taco bell burrito?
You were crying in a drunken stupor for an hour because "the new daft punk album didn't blow your tits off"
I wish our county sheriff had a comment section for their mugshots.
She took her panties off, then farted in my general direction. I guess we're at that stage in our relationship.
I don't think I bit anyone but I woke up to scrapes knees, bruises and new friends.
Randomize
