D3 body, D1 cock
At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
I give him blow jobs while he watches sports.. how am I not his gf yet??
just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
Theres a truck parked on the front yard and i just want to take this opportunity to tell you now that it is not my fault.
Theres a live mouse in the toilet. Goddamn you this is why I don't party here
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
You were riding my three year old's train yelling, 'I think I can, I think I can!!'
I thought I could.
The number of males in the usa getting circumsized are decreasing. Keep this in mind when we become cougars
He sent me a snapchat of him singing wrecking ball. Guess what the wrecking ball was. Hint: he literally came.
Easy Mac and you are the sexiest things in my life
I'm going to a one year olds birthday party to smoke weed. What has my life become.
I really need to stop sending pussy pics if I'm going to be running for state representative in November
Omg I just woke up in his bed.. I'm fully clothed and he is naked. I'm so confused.
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