Im at strip club and am horny
your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
Welp, she's chewing our paper towels again. She's like an obnoxiously hot puppy
I look like a herd of wild horses chewed on my back. If you bite me again while taking me from behind, I'm going to have to cut you off.
I just tried to text you by typing "whoa" into my contacts.
her spring break bucket list included "break into The Swamp, blow him where Tebow has Tebowed"
Almost bit the guy's hand who sits in front of me because he was stretching. That. Bored.
Must've forgot to hang up with her when I was telling Josh I plan to pop champagne if I nail her tonight. She showed up with a bottle and said "only if we can toast it with Josh"
I just found 20 dollars in my vibrator box. Was it a drunken sign to myself to get more?
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
Just keep your throat open and beer will always find its way in.
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
I can't believe the MLB is making the NHL look good.
Randomize
