Unmistakable female orgasm noises coming from upstairs shower
She must've brought a toy -- seriously doubt that he's up to the task
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
I mean we're not committed. He's my first choice, sort of like miller lite. When I'm at the bar I'm going to order one, but if they don't maybe I'll go for a bud or blue moon. I'm certainly not going to stop drinking
I can only imagine the horrible things my future wife is doing on spring break right now.
It's 4th of July all over again, we were chasing with the pool water.
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
I'm trying to decide whether it's worth it to masturbate in this gas station bathroom
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
at least I have the sex noises of his roommate to entertain me while I wait for him to wake up
I threw up in a Buffalo Wild Wings and then got a high-five. I really don't understand America
Remember when you tried to talk but you could only count by 2s?
"fuck it, let's do moonshine" shouldn't be in ANYONE'S vocabulary.
I didn't even know we were hiding from the cops, I was just playing with the cats. People kept telling me to be quiet the cops are here and I was like DID YOU SEE THIS CAT!?
in mid sex he pointed out my great gatsby tattoo and we started discussing themes and metaphors from our fave fitzgerald novels
you need to stop fucking English majors
I’m turning 34 on Friday and I feel like the only thing I’ve accomplished in life so far is getting into pissing matches with clients
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