um i just realized that some of the people at my family reunion look inbred. thats not a good sign.
hahaha beady eyes set close together? defs inbred.
my dads cousin just put a cig in his dogs mouth and says, "look its a commercial for newport!" holy hell i hope im adopted.
you screamed 'he won't go on a date with me, but he gave me a free junior chicken'
well imagine, me dating the manager equals free junior chickens for everyone
hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
So they discontinued the hummer... Now people will have to go door to door to let others know they're assholes
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye
My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
I want someone to sweep me off my feet and you want someone to fuck you on the kitchen table. They're both perfectly logical needs.
Partying with them is like having your dick stapled to your left nostril
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... So sensitive...
His friend still there? Be like "I need to see both of your dicks ASAP"
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
Do you know anyone else that comes home with unexplainable injuries as many nights a week as we do?
Randomize
