addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
i licked the inside of a toilet bowl for $14. i really can't talk about my night.
I really hope that wasn't actually his first time. Because if my first time was anything like that I would NEVER have sex again.
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
come over after work tomorrow, liz and i will make all of your wildest dreams come true. so long as your wildest dreams involve drinking champagne at my house with two girls who won't have sex with you.
So he was supposed to be helping me with my math but instead we ended up drinking coconut rum in his basement and having sex. I think my mom was right, getting a tutor will be good for me. Relieves the stress.
While looking for an apartment, I've realized that the way I rate balconies is on the "how easy would it be to smoke weed here" scale.
What other scale is there?
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
Strip mythology. Everyone wins. Most of all me.
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
And then he said he wanted to "get really weird with me on my horse." I took that as he wants to fuck me while riding my horse. Could be a good time.
Well I'm about 60% wine, 30% pure rage and 10% tears at the moment and I'm disappointed in how little alcohol is in me
this is honestly why we're friends. we drink tea and plan to do drugs together.
My dad is sitting where you rode me
Randomize